And the Oscar Goes To . . .

Michael Christopher Trahan, for his role in "Bedtime".

We had promised Mikie he could stay up and watch the football players and Tom Brady (whom he says is the Greatest Football Player, when he isn't arguing that he plays for the Red Sox). By the end of the 1st quarter, I could not deal with the jumping off the furniture, stealing of my pillows and blankets, and overall insanity that comes with an overly tired three year old. And, since Mike (who has more patience than I and who usually oversees bedtime) would not be pulled away from the TV before half-time, I went to put Mikie to bed.

Of course, the words "Let's go brush your teeth" were like a death sentence, and I had to force Mike to carry the child upstairs during a commercial break. Somehow, during the ordeal, Mikie managed to kick off his pajama pants and underwear. Feeling confident that I could "handle" the situation, I told Mike to go watch the game. Ha ha. After letting him roll around naked for a few minutes, I forced him back into his underwear and pajamas. This only seemed to enrage him more. In a fit, Mikie told me he was "not going to play with me anymore!" I can hold a grudge better than anyone, so far be it from me to let a three year old upstage me. I told him "Fine. Goodnight." and turned and left the room. Here are some of the things you could hear being yelled through the door of his bedroom:

"I AM GOING TO THROW ALL MY CHANCES IN THE GARBAGE FOR THE DAMAGE YOU HAVE DONE TO ME!"

"I AM NOT GOING TO BE YOUR FRIEND ANYMORE!"

"I AM GOING TO PLAY BY MYSELF."

"I AM GOING TO WATCH SCOOBY DOO ALL BY MYSELF."

"MOMMY, YOU ARE GOING TO JAIL. THE POLICEMEN ARE GOING TO TAKE YOU AWAY FOR ALL THE DAMAGE YOU HAVE DONE TO ME!"

I don't know if it was half-time, or if Mikie's yelling was interfering with Mike's enjoyment of the game, because at some point during this tirade, Mike came back upstairs. Ever the grown-up, I was laughing in my bedroom, trying to commit to memory some of the more amusing statements, wishing the camcorder wasn't broken. Immediately after he entered the room, Mikie told Mike:

"You're my best friend, Daddy. You and I can watch Scooby Doo with me but not mommy 'cause Mommy was mean to me. Mommy is going to jail for all the damage she has done to me."

Just for the record, the next morning, he wanted me to get up and get him milk and make him pancakes for breakfast and watch "Super Why" with him. When I asked him if we were friends again, he said "Yeah. You're my best friend, Mommy." So, either he needs to work on his grudge holding capabilities, or he is using me for my ability to reach the maple syrup.

I don't know where he picks up these phrases. If only I had the camcorder, I could have at least won some money on "America's Funniest Home Videos" or "Kids Say the Darndest Things".

Love,
The Trahans