The Dragon Warrior

Have you ever seen the movie "Old School" with Will Farrell and Vince Vaughn? There is a scene towards the end, where Will Farrell does this gymnastics floor routine with a ribbon. He is so serious about his leaps, and it is hysterically funny. This footage of Mikie reminds me of that scene. . .

To put it in perspective, thanks to effective advertising during the Scooby Doo cartoon (the only non-PBS show we let him watch), Mikie is EXTREMELY excited about the new "Kung-Fu Panda" movie with Jack Black. Because it is not currently out on DVD (a concept he doesn't quite appreciate), we have had to download the songs from i-Tunes and play the trailer on the computer about a dozen times a day. In addition, Mike and I spent two and a half hours on Monday morning constructing a Po figure out of paper print outs (one of the "fun" activities on the website). Of course, after Mike spent $3 on the action figures at the store on Tuesday, our hard work is no longer appreciated. Granted, I think both Mike and I would have killed Mikie had he broken the paper Po after we finished. . .

9 more days until the movie opens. . .

Love, The Trahans

Mother's Day

To celebrate Mother's Day, my mom flew up for the weekend. We all drove down to Misquamicut to visit Grandma Kerrie. Mikie had painted some lovely sculptures for the two Grandma's. He wanted to paint snakes for both, but I convinced him that we should look for something else for Grandma Pookie (since I didn't think she would appreciate a snake as much as Grandma Kerrie). Unfortunately, I haven't gotten the pictures developed of the Mother's Day gifts, because they were quite the site (Grandma Kerrie somehow thought her snake was a bong. . . )
While Mike, my mom and I all enjoyed breakfast, Mikie helped Grandma Kerrie take orders. He's cheap labor; all he asks in return is to work the ice cream machine. So, after eating only a chocolate donut for breakfast, Mikie feasted on a large cup of chocolate ice cream.
As we were about to get on 95-North, we got a call that Gram, Auntie Di, Auntie Shell and Arcangelo were at the beach. So, we turned around for another two hours of fun. Mikie had taken Norm's request to heart, and attempted to push the sand pile around on the beach. Arcangelo, who was initially distressed at the mess Mikie was getting into, quickly decided that if you can't beat them, join them. See some of their antics here:

The best gift of the day: Mikie was so worn out he slept for three hours afterwards.

Happy Belated Mother's Day.

Love, The Trahans

Happy Birthday, Auntie Katie

Tomorrow, my sister turns 27. I would say that's old, but since she is my "baby" sister, I can't. Yes, the same sister who, when I turned 19, told me "You're old. Next year you'll turn 20, which is REALLY old, then you die." Granted, she wasn't even 16 at the time, so I guess her perspective was a little warped. Given her track record of dislocated knees, it's amazing she can still WALK in her old age. In honor of her birthday (no, I won't sing), Mikie picked out a lovely card. Actually, he picked it out as a wedding card for my cousin John's wedding (since it has a tongue sticking out on the front, it wasn't exactly appropriate). However, it was befitting of Auntie Katie. . .
In addition to the sentimental card, Mikie has picked out the most thoughtful gift for his favorite Aunt. . . a playground. By thoughtful, I meant he thought of what would benefit him. Not unlike his favorite aunt. Two peas in a pod. He said that he would rent a truck so she could drive it to her house and put it together so she could play on it with "a lot of toys". When I informed him that Auntie Katie lives in a little house with Bud & Henri (Mikie's favorite fuzzy friends), he seemed very upset. The conversation went like this:

Me: "Auntie Katie lives in a little house. She doesn't have room for a playground. She can use the one at her school, and she can come play on your swingset."

Mikie: "I have a BIG house, with lots of toys."

Me: "Yes, you do." You don't have to remind me, because your dad and I pay the mortgage.

Mikie: "We can build Auntie Katie a BIG house so that she can have lots of toys AND a playground."

Okay, so building Katie a big house IS more thoughtful than gifting her a swingset that he can use when visiting. However, I THINK he might have a warped sense of how much money we have. Just slightly. I mean, I know the cost of living is less in North Carolina than in Massachusettes. But, if I had that kind of cash lying around, I think Mike and I would be on some beach with our nanny right now.

So, to Katie, the old maid. If I win the lottery, I promise to build you a BIG house.

Happy Birthday.

Love, The Trahans

Top Ten Quotes of the Day

Okay, I don't have ten. But, Mikie has had some pretty good lines lately. Here's a run down of some of today's favorites:

1. Target: Mikie recognizes certain places by sight (chalk it up to effective brand marketing): Dunkin Donuts, Home Depot, and TARGET. His favorite place is Target, primarily because it sells toys. So, when we pulled up at the mall to get my bracelet shortened, he was disappointed to hear that there wasn't a Target inside. While I was trying to carry on a conversation with the sales girl, Mikie kept trying to interrupt me to tell me why we needed to leave and go to Target (he should really be on their payroll). His best excuse: "If we don't go to Target NOW, it may close on us FOREVER." While the economy may be weak, I feel confident that Target won't be closing forever. At least not this week.

2. Clothes: After the unproductive trip to the jewelers, we went in search of an outfit for Mikie to wear to my cousin's wedding in two weeks. As I tried to drag him into Gymboree, I explained that we needed to get him a nice shirt for the wedding. His response (which seemed to amuse the sales girl): "I don't want a nice shirt for the wedding. I can wear THIS shirt." I tried to explain that the faded orange T-shirt emblazoned with the words "I GET MY MUSCLES FROM MY DAD" was not appropriate formal wear. He didn't seem to believe me (or care).

3. Speed Racer: After Gymboree, we went to Sears in search of the elusive dress shirt. I figured it was safe, since Sears only sells toys at Christmas. However, they had a small display of Speed Racer toys strategically placed in the children's clothing section. Of course, Mikie NEEDED a Speed Racer car. So, I promised he could pick out one if he was good. He picked out one (the white Mach 5 car), but informed me that "On Tuesday, I can get the yellow car." When I told him that today WAS Tuesday, he said "On the FIRST Tuesday, I can get the yellow car." By the time we reached the front of the line, Tuesday became Friday. And, as we exited the store, he said "On Thursday, I can get the yellow car." Luckily, he has no concept of time, so he shouldn't be too upset when we don't make it back to the store in two days.

Love, The Trahans

Bad Habits

I feel the need to preface this post by saying we are good parents. Overall, I think Mikie is a clean and well behaved child. I don't think he has any gross habits (although, like most children his age, he does like to pick his nose and eat it). So, I am embarrassed to admit to being the parents of the kid that pees in the playground.

Yes, today when I picked Mikie up at school, the teacher told me he had a good day, with the exception of an incident on the playground. I braced myself, expecting to hear that he stole a toy or pushed another child. The teacher informed me that Mikie called her over while they were playing outside, saying, "Ms. Janice. I have something cool to show you." As she approached, Mikie proceeded to pull down his pants and take aim. She ran over and told him that we could not pee outside, that if he had to use the bathroom, he had to go inside. Mikie's response: "It's okay, my dad let's me do it."

It started out innocently enough. Mike and Mikie were waiting for me in a parking garage in New York when Mikie announced he had to pee. Not having enough time to turn off the car and run into a nearby building, Mike showed Mikie how to "pee on the road" (as Mikie calls it). And, I have to admit, when we are on long trips, or even driving our 45 minute commute to work, if Mikie tells me he has to "pee on the road", I pull over to a wooded area and let him out. Each time, I try and explain that we can't pee anywhere. We have to be in the woods, not in someone's yard. And, preferably in a place where no one will see us (or catch us as the case may be). Unfortunately, this doesn't always work out (remember the post about peeing in Home Depot's parking lot under the surveillance camera?)

Obviously, I was MORTIFIED. I could picture all the toddler boys in Mikie's class running home and peeing in their backyards because "Mikie does it". I tried to explain the history to the teacher, who said not to worry about it, she didn't care what he did elsewhere, she just wanted him to know he couldn't do it at school.

I immediately called Mike. Mostly to blame him for teaching our son this bad habit, since I am not equipped to teach him (even if I haven't exactly discouraged it). His response, "I guess we need to teach him NOT to blame Daddy."

Really, we ARE good parents. I promise.

Love, The Trahans

The Playdate

The title sounds innocent enough. Like "Halloween", it is a title that can be used to describe an event, or a horror film. This was our first REAL playdate. And, as you will see below, I understand why we hadn't had a playdate before.

Mikie's best friend at school is Connor. And, since Connor's parents had recently done us a huge favor watching Mikie while I was sick, I felt like we should have Connor over for a playdate.

A playdate would have been an adventure in and of itself. I mean, two active four year olds (or, almost four in Mikie's case) against parents who have never dealt with more than one child at a time. But, our first playdate couldn't just be some run-of-the-mill-come-over-to-our-house afternoon. No, I decided we should all go to the CIRCUS!

In my defense, I was drunk at the time I suggested this plan. But, after the alcohol had worn off and I had slept on it for a week, the idea still sounded fun. After all, Mikie loves the circus. . . Mikie loves spending time with Connor. And, taking both kids to the circus meant I didn't have to plan activities for them to do all day when they got bored playing with the same stuff.

So, $177 later, I had bought four adult tickets to the circus (because Ringling Bros. considers you an adult if you are over the age of two), which included parking.

The big day rolled around. After picking up Connor, we headed off to the circus. We were an hour and a half early, which meant we had time to see the animals and the pre-show. Half of the arena is closed off with make-shift pens to house all the circus animals. It's a big area (since it is an arena), and somewhat chaotic since there are lots of parents and their kids running around trying to see the animals. They let you walk through before hand and see them up close. They have handlers on hand to tell you all about them. Connor's parents had told me that he likes to run off, so I spent all of my time trying to keep a hand (or at least an eye) on Connor while Mike held on to Mikie. We figured that man-on-man defense was our best approach. No joke, both kids were done seeing the animals in under ten minutes. They were both obsessed with the souvenir stand that was "conveniently" set up at the entrance and exit to the animal exhibit. So, against my better judgement, I let them each pick out a souvenir before the show. I was hoping it would keep them entertained throughout the rest of the event (even though I knew I would not be that lucky).

$41 later, Connor was the proud owner of two zebras (mom and baby), and Mikie walked away with a twirling dancing, light-up elephant toy. Interestingly enough, Mikie picked the exact same toy LAST time we went to the circus. So, NEXT time, we will be smart enough to bring it with us.

On to the pre-show. Again, our man-on-man defense worked well. I went with Connor to help a juggling clown. We met up with Mike and Mikie to dress up as circus performers, before catching Asia, the painting elephant. At this point in time, Connor asked for the one drink that they do not sell at the circus - - orange juice. I know this for a fact, because, not wanting the kid to have a bad time, I spent 10 minutes looking. I did find a Tropicana vending machine. But, it was empty. I guess the circus personnel figured what kid would want orange juice when they can have a rainbow colored snow cone in a zebra cup. $7.50 later, I returned with a large orange flavored soda (conveniently, they didn't have small or medium sizes) and a water. Although Connor did not like orange flavored soda, Mike took one for the team and drank it. Mikie, thankfully, was willing to share his water with his friend.

All of this activity brought us to the start of the show. As we walked to our seats, Connor decided that he wanted an elephant to go with his zebras. Knowing this would not be the end of the requests for stuff, I told him "Maybe later."

Let me take this opportunity to mention that Connor, in addition to being Mikie's best friend, is the youngest child of one of the VPs at Crabtree. So my motivation for keeping him happy was probably greater than most kids. First was the obvious: I don't want to hear the kid whine all day. Second: I don't want the kid to go home and complain that he had a bad time. Because, unlike other parents who I would only see at daycare during pick-up and drop-off, I have to work with Connor's dad. In hindsight, this should have entered my brain BEFORE suggesting the playdate. Unfortunately, the thought only occurred everytime I was faced with discipling or pacifying the two children . . .

The first half of the circus seemed to keep them happy. Mikie sat in his seat, or on one of our laps, watching the show. For the most part, Connor did the same. Although, he must have thought that his seat was on the floor, or in the aisle in front of us, since he and his zebras seemed to hang over the empty seat in front of them for a good part of the first act. As soon as intermission hit, Connor started to leave. I told him that the show wasn't over yet, and he said he needed an elephant. Trying to keep both kids in their seats (since, even if I wanted to get him the elephant now, there was no way we would get back before they started the second act), I promised we would get an elephant when the show was over.

And so began the longest second act of my life. Every five minutes, Connor turned to me to ask "Is it over yet?" or "Can we go now?" I slowly began to understand why many of the parents around me had gotten beers at the concession stand during intermission.

Eventually, the show ended. And, by this point, Mikie wanted a light-up sword. So, we ventured back to the souvenir stand. $50 later, we had one elephant and one light-up sword. I was smart enough to know that these toys were Mike and my tickets out of there. Holding the bags hostage, I promised each child could have their newest toy when they got in the car. It's not bribery, it's an incentive. . .

In addition to the loot the kids picked out, we also purchased two copies of a photo of Mikie and Connor posing on the Ringling Bros. elephant (see picture below), and two matching Ringling Bros. t-shirts. And one funnel cake for Mike and I, since you can't get funnel cake every day. This brought our grand total to: $348.50. Excluding gas.Shortly after we arrived home, I decided I was done with playdates. Or, at least, THIS playdate. Since the boys were playing nicely, Mike left to go to the grocery store. I made them each a sandwich (their request, although we were prepared to go to Friendly's), which neither one wanted to eat because they were "playing". Five minutes later, Connor was trying to break into the pantry (we keep it locked). I opened it up so he could see what was inside. He immediately took Mikie's Easter basket and helped himself to an egg. Mikie immediately took it back and told me to lock it up. He then informed Connor there weren't any more Easter eggs. Connor then decided he wanted to see Mikie's room. Mikie led him upstairs to show him his games. Five minutes later, and Connor had emptied the toy box of things Mikie hadn't played with since we moved in 18 months ago. I walked in to find him trying to break into the closet (another locked door). Not having learned my lesson the first time, I opened it up to show him it just had clothes in it. Alas, he saw some stuffed animals and old Halloween costumes that he wanted to play with.
Next thing I knew, Mike had returned from the store to find the two boys running around downstairs. I was upstairs, struggling to clean up the path of destruction left in their wake and bring down the toys Mikie told me they "needed" to play with downstairs.

It was now 7pm. We had the pleasure of Connor's company for a full 6 1/2 hours. Since he was refusing to eat the sandwich I had made (or anything else I was volunteering to make for him), I decided it was time to end this playdate. Since Mikie hadn't napped, Mike suggested I drive Connor home (40 minutes away) by myself so that he could get Mikie to bed. Connor sold out for the promise of watching a movie in the car. Mikie, unfortunately, was hysterical that he couldn't come too (although I think he was more upset that he couldn't watch the movie than he was about Connor leaving).

Which brings us to now. It is 10pm. All the children are asleep in their own houses. Mike is enjoying the Red Sox game in the midst of a living room full of toys. I am downing a Fuzzy Navel while reflecting on the day's events. What are the lessons I have learned? First, playdates to the circus are not a good idea, unless you are willing to shell out some serious cash. I shudder to think what could have been purchased with the money we gave Ringling Bros. today. Second, a playdate with a coworker's child is a dangerous thing. Odds are, you will feel guilted into spoiling the child so as not to ruin your relationship with the coworker. Lastly (and most importantly) NEVER embark on a playdate unless you are POSITIVE that you like the other child.

All kidding aside, I am sure we will have Connor over again. It just may not be before we have a finished basement that we can lock them in to wreak havoc on and not worry about the consequences. Which won't be for a while, given the shear amount of money spent on this first playdate. . .

Love, The Trahans